A Grand Storyness

A Grand Storyness

This was one of the very first stories we wrote. (written sophmore year of high school) ^^


It begins…in the bathroom?

page 1

By Amy

A scream came from the bathroom, Jen and Sally stopped fighting, and put their katanas down to investigate. They looked inside to find Ali foaming at the mouth staring wildly at the toilet. She turned quickly to Sally and jen. "RABIES!" Jen screamed, "MUST RESCUE ALI!!" "No Jen, No!" Ali tried to stop her but it was too late. They both flew into the bathtub, with jen trying to choke the rabies out of her friend. "oh my." cried Sally. Jen stopped choking Ali and looked back at Sally, then to where she was pointing. THE TOILET! It too was foaming. "It gave Ali rabies!" Jen screamed. "revenge for Alex!" With that she lunged at the toilet and started beating it with a plunger.Ali spit the tooth paste out of her mouth.

"That's what I screamed about!And it spit out this!" She threw a card at Jen, hitting her in th back of the head. Jen turned from the toilet and growled at her new attacker. Ali let out a little squeak right before Jen lunged herself at her again.

Sally calmly walked over and picked up the card and read it out loud.

Dear Insanity trio, you are all accepted to my school of magic. Join us, or DIE!!
Sincerely, ME


page 2

"Finally a new school!" said Ali.
"ooh, magic!" said Sally.
"DIE! DIE! DIE!" Cried jen. Ali slapped her in the back of the head. "Sincerely me? Who's that?" She finished.

"Oh, there's directions" Sally stated after she flipped the card over. "they say we must do the following to get to school:
1) turn around 45 times clockwise" (they did)
"2) do it again, because Jen went the wrong way."
Sally looked at jen surprised. "How did they know I would?" She cried, but Sally and Ali shrugged, and they spun again.
"3) good, now the voodoo spirit dance "(they did)
"4) Alex, flush the toilet. " She reached over and flushed.

Just then, a large hand came out of the bathtub, and went for Jen. She dove out of the way. It opened up a large closet door with a sign that said: "DO NOT OPEN!" There was a large portal on the other side.

"I always wondered what was behind that door." Stated Ali, looking through. Jen and sally moved closer. "I always thought it was really special towels" Jen said, eating beef jerky. The hand beckend, but Ali and Jen started fighting again.1Finally, it pushed them all in and slammed the door shut.

A new School! indeed


page 3

"whhhhhhhaaaaaaa!"*THOMP!* Ali felt the ground. She picked herself up and looked around. Little Fluffy frolicked by…..then a T-rex, chasing them. THUDDD! Ali looked back, Sally fell 20 feet away from her. "where's Jen?" She asked, but then…..


Jen moaned waist high in mud. She glared evilly at the cliff she hit, then walked over to the others. "which way now?" Sally wondered. "TURN AROUND, FOOLS!" The three jumped at the vioce. "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" They screamed.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Screamed the voice.
"AAAAAHHHHH-oh, it's you." jen looked dissapointed.


page 4

Amy smiled, "Welcome to my school of magic! We haven't come up with a name for it yet2. Follow!" She brought them inside to the greeting hall.

"How did you come to own this?" Ali asked suspiciously while doing the can-can. Amy smiled and pointed to a large sign. "I came, I saw, I purred?" Sally read, confused. "WHAT?!" Amy turned and looked at the sign. "Stupid punk cats!" She went and cleaned off the sign. "there."

"I came, I saw, I pleaded Insanity?" Ali read. "I don't get how that got you the-" "-WELL!" Amy said happily, We must get you to the greeting ceremony!"

"That explains where she's been for the last two days." Jen said. Amy opened tow great doors and showed them in. "Oh, by the way," she stated, "I'll be joining you in the classes, because I have no idea what I'm doing." With that she left to go to the stage where she could make her greeting speech and introduce the teachers.

sally writing
Everyone focused their attention to her on the stage. Suddenly Amy realized everyone was watching her. "Uhhhhmmm…I did my project on moles… I mean rats.."she nervously called out, then yelled "Where are those blasted teachers? They can't even show up for school? Who do they think they are, anyhow?" Then she exited the stage, mumbeling about how they expected her to introduce her. The audience sat there.


page 5

jen writing

There was silence as the teachers entered the room. All that could be heard was an occasional stomach growling. How long had it been since they'd eaten? The teachers, faces hidden under dark cloaks all lined up along the teachers table next to Amy who was still mumbeling to herself.

Suddenly, the teachers took off their cloaks and Sally, Alex and Jen screamed hysterically. The entire school looked at them. "oh yeah" replied Amy. "I got our old teachers to teach here." "Oh." they gasped, while the rest of the school exchanged looks.


page 6

The sorting; Band of Monkeys, Smoke Signal, Asylum, and Pink Vulture Clan.

"We will now be sorting students into their houses." said Proffesor Queen.3"the houses are Band of monkeys, Smoke Signal, Asylum, and __ Pink Vulture Clan__" " I am head of house Band of Monkeys" said Queen. "Satan's4head of house Smoke Signal, Boggasouras5 is head of house Asylum and Groucho Marx6 is the head of Pink Vulture clan."

"NOW LET THE SORTING BEGIN!" Yelled Amy as she jumped out of her chair.

Alex writing

Then, Amy took up a long roll of parchment. The parchment was so big, that she fell over! "Argh….ow!" She cried as she hit the floor and rolled down the steps. She struggled with her cloak, and the weight of the parchment, then finally stood upright. "I'm okay!" She shouted, reassuring everybody. "I'm okay!" Then, still struggling with the weight, She climbed back up the stairs, and turned to face the students. She sighed deeply.


page 7

"Okay, I will now begin to sort you into your houses. When I call your name, I will ask you a few simple questions, and I will decide where you go."

"Alex Chaya"

Nervously, Alex stepped forward. She walked past Amy, and sat on the stool. Amy, slowly, put the parchment down, and walked towards Alex. "Ms Chaya. If that IS your name"
Alex was confused. "Of course that's my name? Why wouldn't it be?" Amy just sighed. "Alex Chaya, how is it you ended up here?" "Well," Said Alex. She was a bit proun to self-conscience behavior (cuz she's crazy, obviously) "I was foaming at the mouth over the toilet. Don;t know why I was at the toilet and foaming. But Jen came in, with Sally, and said I had rabies, so-"
"No no NO!" Amy shouted.


page 8

Then she sighed in frustration. "Never mind. Alex, where were you, on the night of december 12th, at nine pm, at night?" "December 12th?" Alex repeated, a little quietly. She shrugged. "I was sleeping." "sleeeeping you say?" Amy asked, suspiciously. "yeah…" Alex replied, slowly.
"Okay" Amy shrugged, satisfied. She walked back over to the parchment. Alex was stunned and confused. "Tha-that's it?" "yeah" Amy replied, nodding her head. "you're in band of monkeys."

The second table to the right errupted in applause, so Alex, still slightly confused, got off the stool and walked over to the table and sat down. Once it got quiet again (which didn't take long, when Amy gave them all "the look") Amy continued.

"Sally Gorrill."

Sally didn't think the questions could be too rad, so she wasn't too nervous to go up to the stool.


page 9

She sat down and Amy began the interrogation. "Please name for me the genious and scientific name for the wolf." Which type of wolf?" Sally asked, a little cautiously. "uh.." Amy paused. "I don't know."

Sally writing

Sally said "Frog." Then she left. Amy called Jen to the stand. Jen promptly began to sing the ABC's as loud as she could.

Jen writing

Amy strained to speak over her. "you're in Pink Vulture Clan, and Sally is in Smoke Signal. And since I'm a student, I'm in Asylum.

Sally, Alex, Amy and jen looked at each other. "noooooooo!!! We're in different houses!" While Amy howled, Sally, Alex and Jen exchanged glances. "house Asylum must be the insane house." Whispered sally. They looked at Asylum's table, which was all screaming and jumping all over the place. "No, i think it's smoke signal" replied jen. They were all calmly sitting at their table.



"well, I think Pink Vulture Clan is stupid!" yelled Amy. "yeah!" Jen agreed. There was a pause, then "hey!!" Alex, Sally and Amy laughed. "well, if house Asylum is crazy, smoke signal is thoughtfull, and Vulture Clan is not so bright7, then what is Band of Monkeys?" Wondered Sally. They looked over at House Band of Monkey's table. They were all asleep. "OH MY GOD! THEY ALL HAVE NARCAROLEPSY!!!" Jen screamed. With that, both house Pink Vulture and Asylum began screaming.


Amy roured.



Nobody moved. Nobody even spoke. "You will NOT Panic! There is nothing to panic about! Now, sit down so we can all eat!" Everyone obediantly sat down.

Amy muttered some magic words, and food apreared before thier eyes. After dinner, everyone went to their different house rooms. Everything had already been moved up, and tomorrow they would start new classes.

They began to talk to their roomates. In Amy's room, there was much insanity and screaming. Boggasourus, head of Amy's house entered to say a few things then left for a meeting.

In Sally's house, many people talked about the meaning of life, and how life came to be.

In Jen's house, they wreaked havoc and destroyed things.
In Alex's house,



Alex writing

everyone was sleeping, at the moment. Alex couldn't believe her luck. IN a house full of narcoleps. But, then, everyone woke up. "Is everyone ready to have a party?" Fred asked. Alex gasped. "Fred and George Weasley?!" she asked, amazed. "yes! it's us!" they said, joyfully. "But…I thought everyone was narcoleptic.." alex said, still amazed. "that's what jen wrote." "well, it's not true." Fred shrugged. "although, some may be" George added. Then the Weasley twins looked, a little suspiciously, over their shoulders. There stood the forgetfull Neville, fast asleep and snoring.

Jen writing

"no, he's just asleep because we're the PARTY HOUSE!" Suddenly, loud music filled the room, and everyone jumped up. "cool" thought Alex.



The next day, Sally, Alex and Amy all sat next to each other. "so your house is the party house?" Amy asked Alex excitedly. "yup. I went to bed ten minutes ago, and Fred had to wake me up for breakfast." "uhmmm, this is lunch." "oh" said Alex. "WHAM!" her head hit the table with a loud bang. " I wonder what happened to Jen's house. None of them are here." Sally wondered.

Suddenly, Jen's house marched in wearing sheep's costums and chittering like squirrells. Leading them was Jen, dressed normally, but looking very proud of herself. "SIT DOWN!" She barked, and they all sat down. "no no no" Jen sighed irratably shaking her head. "at the table!!" They obayed, and Jen walked happily over to Sally, Alex and Amy. "Guess What!" She cheered. "My house is the lemming house, and since I overcame being a lemming, I'm the leader and they do what I tell them!"


"Well that's good Jen." replied Amy. "so why are they dressed like sheep?" "I forgot what lemmings looked like" Then the bell rang for their first class. Band of Monkeys and Smoke Signal were going to go to Potions with Professor Lindstedt. Asylum and Pink Vulture clan go to care of magical creatures with Professor Boggs.

Alex writing
Then everyone got up and dispersed. Everyone had left Alex behind! Alex lay there, sleeping, while everyone went to their new classes.

IN potions:

Professor Lindstedt was a cruel teacher, with a hilarious sense of humor. He made fun of everyone! [professor] Lindstedt favored hos own house, even if he didn't have his own house. He had his house made up of an apple, amy writing a pink gerbil, and a…a…well, no one knew quite what that thing was. Just that it was called Foobles.

Sally mixed potions of Invisability, fish smelling chips, and water. Everybody was amazed. Lindstedt scowled. Alex walked, or stummbled into the room, and fell on the floor. "YOU!" Lindstedt yelled and grabbed her shirt coller. Alex whimpered as another professor came into the room, and whispered something into Lindstedt's ear.



"Really?" Lindstedt asked, the other teacher nodded. Lindstedt dropped Alex, and ran out of the room. The other professor looked at the students. "Stay here and don't make a mess!" he left and the students waited until the last bit of orange was gone…then they started throwing potions at each other.

Meanwhile, at Care of magical creatures, Boggs demonstrated the "proper" way to feed a dragon. While Amy passed out a paper that stated

'I, ______(write name here) state that and harm that comes to me inside school walls, is the fault of my own stupidity, and I will not hold the school, or any of it's professors
responsible, Even if I die."

"Please sign these and hand them back to me." Amy said politly, smiling evilly at Jen, making her whimper. The same teacher that went to Lindstedt came to her. "Professor Boggs" Amy said, waiting for him to crawl out of the dragon's mouth. Jen looked up at the teachers. "GOKU!!" She screamed and jumped up.


"Jen, I've heard so much about you. Look! It's Shin!" he pointed behind her. jen flew around, searching behind her.

"Hey…" she turned back. "he's not …" the teachers and Amy were gone. "Instant transmission! Instant transmission! Instant transmission! " She started bouncing up and down chanting. This got her lemming house mates to start doing the same. Amy's house started doing thier own insane things.

The teachers gathered in a dark hallway.
"He's back…" Morgan said solmonly.
"stronger then ever.." continued Stash. "Amy, you've never had to deal with this threat yet, but you are the headmaster of the school…..so you're going to have to now."

jen writing

Alex whimpered. "HEY! Get out of here!" They kicked her, and she flew out. "What are we going to do?" Pondered Satan. Everyone looked at Amy. "oh, sure. All because I own this school and I pay you're money, I have to make all the tough desicions! WELL I WON'T HAVE IT!!"


"Hey!!" she cried. "I've got an idea!" Everyone groaned.
"we'll send an expedition of randomly selected students to go find him and stop him!"

"But the students can't beat him!" "well, better them then us!" Queen gasped in horror. "How will we choose?" "How's about the first people to pass by this door!" With that, Amy threw open the door and Jen, Sally, and Alex, who had been leaning against the door listening, fell through the doorway onto Amy. "Or,..we can just make these guys go." Amy growled. "Well, I think that you should go with them so they don't get lost. " replied Boggasourus. "FINE!!" yelled Amy.


Alex writing

So, with that, Jen, Sally, Amy and Alex packed there odd things, then grabbed their broomstick-patrolled-flying-invisible-carpets-with-state-of-the-art-handeling-and-7-wheel-
steering-non-bumby-aluminum-and-bendy-mobiles, and they flew to find…(bum, bum BUHM!) HIM!!!!!

And so our heroes set off on a wild adventure….

A few miles (kilos) later…

"I'm bored." Alex whined.
"Shut up" Amy sighed.
"But I'm bored!!" Alex yelled at her.
"THEN FIND SOMETHING TO DO!!!!" Amy yelled back.

They continued, walking in silence, before Alex continued.
"I'm tired, I'm hungry, I'm thirsty."
"Oh, SHUT UP!" Amy screamed. Rearing on Alex, she grabbed her wand from inside her robes, and blasted Alex 20 feet back.8
"Ahhhhhhhhh-ugh!" She landed, forcefully on her back.


Still enraged with anger, Amy turned back, still seathing, and carried on. Reluctantly, Sally and Jen followed, leaving Alex in the dirt.9

A few miles(kilos) later…

"I'm bored" Alex whined. Amy, still angry, had her wand clutched in her hand and turned to face Alex…to see she wasn't there. No longer shaking with fury, she was overwhelmed with confusion.
"I'm hungry Amy." The whining voice of Alex's came from beside Amy. Amy spun. But Alex wasn't there either. It was only jen and Sally. More confused now then ever, Amy now moved slowly around her, her wand held out to protect her. When her back was facing Jen and Sally, Amy heard Alex's annoying voice again. "I'm tired. Can't I sit down? Can't we-"

Amy spun around. The second she did, the voice stopped. Amy found her two suspects. Jen, and Sally.


She studied them, looking for any signal that they're not who they say.10
Amy studied Sally first. Sally stood there, looking innocent and confused. "what's the matter, Amy?" Amy didn't respond, but she was sure that Sally was the real Sally. So Amy turned to jen. Jen looked normal enough. Bored with a slightly sad look, which she gets when she's thinking.11
Amy was about to turn her back to jen, when she caught a glimpse of something in her eyes. Studying her harder, she formed her hypothesis of what she saw. Was it..a demonic gleam, of some kind? Definetly. More than regularly, certainly.
Still clutching her wand, Amy moved slightly toward her. Jen, sensing danger, grabbed her wand from inside her cloak, and pointed it at Amy, as Amy pointed hers at Jen. Sally, instinctivly, stepped back.
"I gave you a plant for your birthday. What did you name it?" Amy asked quicky. "I don;t know" Jen replied exasperatedly. "I call it a lot of things." "I didn't give you a plant. You don't take care of the ones you have. Amy said.


Sally was a little scared. "Amy, what are you doing?" Again, Amy didn't respond. Instead, she showed Sally.

"Reveal yourself!" Amy screamed. Out of her wand, flowed a bright green-tinted light, and it engulfed Jen like a gust of wind. Sally was aghast. Then, she was even more shocked. It turned out that Jen wasn't really Jen. Amy was right! Jen was then transformed into: jen writing Alex.12

"Will you stop playing games!!?!!" Screamed Amy. "NOW WHERE'S JEN?!''
"here I am!!" yelled Jen as she catapulted from a tree to land on Alex. Jen laughed evilly while Alex complained. Then Jen began to mimic her. "my shiiinnnnees hurt! I'm tiiiiirrrreeeed! I'm huuunnngry!!!" Amy laughed. "you sound like Shawna."13"exactly!" replied Jen. They were refering to one of their friends.


The bunnie incident…

Suddenly, they heard these strange crashing noises in the woods, slowly coming closer. "Hide!! Quick!~" Yelped Amy, and the evil 4 dived into the brush. Slowly, the strange creature came into view. Sally, Alex Amy and jen gasped. "It's a troll!" said Sally. "No! It can't be! the sun is out!14 It must be a-a-a baby giant!" shouted Amy.

"A baby giant?" chorused Sally, Alex and Jen. "Listen!" whispered Amy. 'boom……booom….Booom…BOOOOM….BOOOOM!!' "it's getting closer! cried Alex in unrest. "Maybe it won't come this way.." jen hoped. Then they saw a giant foot crashing through the tree branches above their heads.



Sally, Amy, Jen and Alex dodged just in time.


The foot came inches from their heads. They screamed again. "what do we do?! WHAT DO WE-" WHACK!! Amy slapped Jen.

"There's more coming!" Screamed Sally. "AHHHHHHHH!!!!" screamed Alex. More giant feet crashed into view. "Wait! I'm a wizard! I can stop this!" Amy writing

I summon the only creature that has killed millions of giants!" A red lighting bolt came form her wand, and exploded the ground it hit. They all watched as the smoke cleared.

"a rabbit??" Alex cried, looking horrified at Amy. "It has huge fangs! she replied, doing fang movements with her hands.15


"LOOK! it moves" Sally said in awe. They watched as the creature hopped in front of one of the giants path. It stopped and looked down at the rabbit. "It's going to kill him now!" Amy cried happily.


The giant's voice vibbrated for miles. Sally, Jen and Amy sat and listened… all the crashing had stopped.


Thousands of voices echoed back.


Silence again.


The girls looked at each other and screamed as they started bouncing up and down from giants running towards them.

"RUN AWAY!!!" Jen yelled
"RUN AWAY!!!" Amy yelled
Ali and Sally didn't bother screaming, they just ran.

They ran as fast as they could away from the rabbit. they ran for hours it seemed. Till finally, they stopped for a rest.

"I..(huff huff) think we lost them" Jen said with her hands on her knees.


Just then, a little white rabbit hopped by them. The girls looked at each other and screamed.


Amy ran ahead of them all, feeling the ground shake behind her. jen saw her disapear into the brush. She stopped and looked around. "Amy?" Jen felt something grab her leg and pull, then everything went black.

Jen woke up in a cave and looked at her friends. "Where are we?" she asked, rubbing the sore on her head. "I don't know, but I think we're closer to him" Sally said looking around. The cave extended for miles in front of them. "should we?" Alex asked. The got up and started walking deeper into the cave towards a strange glowing light.


Captured! oh my!

They came to a large opening in the cave, it was a large room, in which it was obvious somthing was living in it. Voices came from the other end of the room, in the darkness. "you fools! what did I tell you! NO eating in the lab!" Ali looked back at Amy. Can you get our invisiblility cloaks?" Amy took off her backpack and unzipped it.

"TUNA!" G.I.R. poped out of it, stuffing his face full of the canned fish. "G.I.R?" Amy said, surprised. "where's the cloak?" "At the school!" he replied happily. "WHAT?!" Jen yelled, then put her hand over her mouth. "what was that?" the evil voice responded, "Fluffy, Evil, go see what that was."

Alex began whimpering16, Jen and Sally ran around looking for places to hide, and Amy tried to do a usefull spell, but kept making sporks appear. Jen screamed and fainted when Fluffy and Evil came from the darkness.
Fluffy grabbed Alex by the shirt collar and picked up the unconsious Jen.


Evil grabbed Sally and Amy, who was still summoning sporks.
"Hey! Coach! We got some idiots from that unnamed school of magic" Fluffy yelled, approaching the cloaked figure. Jen woke up and screamed when the man took off his hood.


Amy yelled and got out of Evil's grasp and ran over to hug Vegeta. He casually stepped to one side, letting Amy fall on her face. He glared at Evil. "Bring them to the dungion," Vegeta smiled evilly, "then do 500 circuts for letting her go!"17

Jen and Alex found themselves in a cell, with Amy and Sally nowhere to be found.
** jen writing**

"He made Evil do 500 circuts?! we have to rescue him from this place!!" "shut up, hussey"Fluffy growled from the dungion door. Jen walked over. "Don't you want to be free?" She asked him. Fluffy didn't respond.


"If you want us to rescue you guys when we escape, we will" Alex offered. "I can escape if I want." Fluffy growled. "and besides, you won't be escaping. Give up! It's hopeless! You'll never even get out of that room!"

Jen then unlocked the door and hit Fluffy. "Stop Telling Me What I Can't Do!" Then she turned and walked back into the cell and Alex followed suit. The stunned Fluffy just stood there………..Meanwhile….Poor Evil ran circuts….poor, poor Evil…..

Where Amy and Sally were, they were standing in a dungion, with Vegeta gaurding the door. Whenever Evil passed,, he yelled at him to run harder. "Stop being mean to Evil!" Amy said to Vegeta. "I can do whatever I want" Vegeta yelled, as he smacked Evil as he passed again.


"Sally, you've got to help me sto my dad from hurting Evil!"
Sally, however, refused to acknowledge Fluffy and Evil's presence in the story due to the fact it was supposedly 'creepy'.18 "FINE!!" Amy yelled. I'll do it myself!" with that, Amy broke down the door.


She yelled.

Vegeta just glared and shoved her back into the dungion. When Evil passed again, Vegeta stopped him. "Gaurd these little fools with your life!" he snapped. Evil panted while Vegeta stomped off. "Evil! Are you ok?" Amy asked. amy writing "It's not like him…" She mummbled. "My dad must be controled by a greater force!" Amy finished pointeing her finger above her head for emphases.


"Ow!" Sally hit Amy in the back of the head. "wrong story Amy." She said calmly.19
"No! I swear it's this one too!" she cried.

"SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!" Evil yelled with a headache, because they wouldn't shut up. Jen writing

Suddenly, Benny Goodman appeared out of nowhere and hit Amy over the head with a clarinet. "Clarinets are still instruments of death!!" Amy yelled angrily.20

Evil gave her a weird look. "who were you talking to?" he asked. "Benny Goodman..he…he..hit me in the head?"

Evil sighed. "you need to get out of here more then I do." Then Sally asked, "Amy, who are you talking to?" "MYSELF!!!!!!!!" yelled Amy. Evil was hurt because Sally was pretending he didn't exist. Alex writing Alex had disappeared and had vanished.21


Everyone was too busy having fun and blasting each other 200 feet back. Meanwhile, a small handfull of mud was hanging in mid air, was pulled back, then


It hit jen right in the back of the head. "Hey!" she yelled, and spun around. Before she could scream at whatever or whoever had hit her with the mud, she got smacked again. This time, right in the face.

Amy, Sally and everyone else who happened to be there, gasped in astonishment. They were completly silent. Jen's face was compsally writingtelty22 covered in mud, so she couldn't see anything. Thinking Amy was someone else, she started chasing her everywhere. Amy hid in a random hole that appreared in the ground and jen followed her.


We're in, like, a hole…

jen writing

Jen hit the ground. Wipping the dirt of her face, she looked questioningly around. There seemed to be a fight going on overhead, and Amy stood up next to jen looking up at everyone as well. Jen stood up. "so it was you!" she yelled pointing at Amy, but before she could attack Amy, Sally fell down the hole onto her head.

She was soon followed by everyone else, including Fluffy, Evil, and Vegeta.23The hole closed, and they were coverd in darkness. Amy clapped her hands and the tip of her wand emitted a bright light. "What's the meaning of this?" yelled Fluffy. "Shut up!" Vegeta roured. "We were pushed in here by someone!" "But who?" wondered Alex.


yelled a voice.


"DIABLOS???!!!" yelled everyone.

"No, not him. He's my servant. I pushed you in here!"
Everyone turned to see who was speaking. It seemed to be coming from everywhere. Alex gasped.


Everyone turned and screamed. "CHICKEN NUGGET IN A TRENCH COAT?!!!" howled Amy.
"Why?! WHY?!! WHHHHYYYYYYYYY!!!!?!!"


Amy fainted. Fluffy kicked her.

"because I'm evil. he replied. Diablos came over, and chicken nugget sat on his shoulder. "and to prove how evil I am, I'm going to have to kill you all, for knowing too much."24 With that, Diablos and the Chicken nugget dissapeared. "I smell something funny." Jen replied. "well it wasn't me" grummbled Vegeta.25 "no..like……like….MC DONALDS?!" Jen screamed. The room was slowly flooding with ketchup and mustard. "Ahh! We're gunna drown!" Alex cried. "I'm too young to die!" "AAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Screamed Amy coming back to consiousness.


"What do we do?" howled Sally. "I don't know! we…maybe me can-" but Amy sank under the ketchup. "AMY!!!" Yelled Alex. "NOOOOOOOO!!!" Cried jen. But then Vegeta dived under the ketchup to get her. Then, just as they thought they were all goners, the ketchup started lowering. "What's happening?" cried Evil. "Look!" shouted Sally. "DAD!!!" cried Jen. "Goku??!!"26


He was eating the ketchup.27 "eeeeww" Alex made a face. "Hi!" Gokue said. I was just flying by and I smelled food…and I was hungry, soo, I thought I'd eat this" Jen sighed. "Oh well, at least we're alive." "I don't get it" said Alex. "so who's the bad guy?" "obviously the one who JUST TRIED TO KILL US!!!" Fluffy yelled. "OKAY!!!!" Alex yelled back in a sarcastic manner.

"Really, how rude" Vegeta said in a dignified manner. "Dad, why do you have a British accent?" asked Amy. Goku looked over in wonder. Vegeta was wearing one of those Colonial wigs that the judges wore. "wh-wh-wh-WHAT?!" stammered Evil, totally bewildered. As they stared, Vegeta made tea and began sipping it. "Would you like some too?" he asked them. Everyone but Goku slwoly shook their headss. "SURE!" Goku jeered, and began drinking tea from the tea pot.


Vegeta jumped up in disgust. "That's gross! Now I can't have tea! Not from THAT Kettle!" "Hey" said Goku, hurt. Alex writing The Chicken nugget in a Trench Coat and his mind controlled servant, Diablos, were not used to being ignored. And he didn't like it at all. "HEY!! LOOK AT ME!!!" This got nobody's attention.



The Chicken Nugget in a trench coat screamed, jumping up and down in fury on Diablos's shoulder. No one still paid attention. "FINE!!" The chicken nugget in a Trench coat yelled, irritated. "I'll send you all back to your regular classes, But I'll BE BACK! And when I do, you better watch your nose, cuz I'll be chewing on it!" No one was listening, but the chicken nugget in a trench coat paused, confusedly. "Nose? Feet? Back? Butt? Finger?…" He couldn't remember what he was supposed to be chewing on. Again, he got agrivated. "Never Mind! But, I'll be BACK!" With that, he took out his wand, and blasted the ignored people back to class.

Amy, Jen, Sally, Alex, Evil, Fluffy, and Peter Parker fell though the ceiling and landed with a loud
THUD! on a hard surface.

Back to Class


Professor Morgan was outraged. "How dare you!" She cried. "perhaps i should transfigure one of you into a pocket watch? Or maybe a map? Not only are you students and,…" her eyes fell on Evil, Fluffy and Peter parker, "Mysterious personel, " she added disgustedly, "late for your classes, you're IN THE WRONG ROOM!" "We went on a quest!" Jen exclaimed. "we found…" Amy then whispered dramatically, after she paused. "HIM!!"

Everyone except Jen, Alex, Sally, Amy, Evil, Peter Parker (who was sitting there dumbfounded), and Fluffy gasped. Stupid and forgetful Neville Longbottom fainted and fell out of his seat.

"OH MY GOSH!!" Alex screamed. Is he okay??!"

"Don't worry." Professor Morgan said, calmly. "He does that from time to time." Then she continued. "you really found…"she whispered dramatically. "HIM?"

"yeah." Alex shrugged. "It wasn't that big of a deal. We,.." she paused. "actually, we don't know how we got back safe."


"who said you were safe?"28 Professor Queen asked, quietly as a side note. "back to your classes. See you soon!" Alex, Amy, Sally, Jen, Fluffy, Evil, and Peter Parker got up, and walked out of the transfiguration classroom.

"why won't this 'hands off' Queen song ever end?!" Alex screamed. Then, "FINALLY!" Then, "OH GOD! CHURCH CHOIR MUSIC!!!!" Amy was confused. "With Queen?"29 "That's an organ! I HEAR AN ORGAN! CAN SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY THERE'S AN ORGAN IN QUEEN?!?!!" Alex shouted hysterically.

Sally, Amy and Jen exchanged looks of confusion. They all shrugged.





A random janitor type-guy screamed at Alex. He took out his wand and blasted Alex 12,000 feet30down the hallway. Sally, Jen, Amy, Evil, Fluffy, and the-secret-identity-of-spider-man headed towards their real class.

They left Alex on the ground.31"ow." she said. "I'm gonna pass out now." Then Alex passed out.32 "show off!" yelled Jen as they passed her.33

After classes were done, everyone had dinner. Usually students sat with their own house tables. However, since Amy was a student and also the ruler of the castle, Sally, Jen and Alex got to sit with Amy during dinner.

Only four minutes ago, had Alex arisen from her unconscience state. She was still acting stange34, and her head was tilting dangerously close to the gravied-mashed potatoes on her plate.

"what did professor Morgan mean, when she said 'who said you were safe'?" Sally wondered aloud.

"I dunno" Amy shrugged. She was stiring her pepsi35 in a martini glass with one of those tooth picks. The pepsi-in-a-martini-glass also had those neat umbrellas that are so cool.

"Maybe she meant we're all endangered." Jen suggested.36

"Well duh!" Amy said, matter-of-factly. "Look at the staff table!" She gestured with her free hand (the other still stirring the toothpick in the pepsi).


"Lindstedt. The most chaotic and ingenious Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Bartasious! Ruthless! Sinister! And Brown,…well!"

Sally was confused. "What's the matter with Brown?" "Really Amy," Jen agreed, "Why is she so evil?"

Amy laughed, briefly. "Spend some time with her." She said. Then, as a side note, she added quietly, "she's crazy!" Then, also added, "In the best possible way of course."

Jen and Sally were about to agree and say "of course" and nodding thier heads in agreement, when "SPLAT!!!"

That line between Alex and her potatoes was just crossed. She found herself, fast asleep, snoring into her gravied-mashed potatoes.

"That's sad" Sally said quietly.
"Really," Jen agreed. "They were good potatoes too!"37
Amy and Sally stared at Jen. "What?"


Amy Writing

"ATTENTION!" Professor Vern said loudly, quieting the dinning hall. "And now for a word from our sponsers!"

"But I'm way down here!" cried Amy, "I can't make a speech around them."

"NOT YOU! OUR SPONSERS!" Proffesor Johnny the homicidal maniac yelled, "fool!" Amy whimpered.

"And there they are, the people who gave us money to support our school." Queen siad pointing at the entrance way. Everybody turned to look.




Sally, Alex, Jen, Amy, Fluffy, Evil, and the random magical ferret screamed in unison.

Standing in the doorway, was Diablos and the Chicken Nugget in a trench coat.

"IT'S HIM!" Alex yelled. The teachers all looked at her in confusion. "No it isn't, that's my best friend." Queen said casually.

"NO! IT'S HIM!" Alex said






Alex whimpered and hid. Queen looked up and the sponsers were gone. The message had already spread….

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